A Millennium Gone By
by icywarm
Summary: What would happen if reincarnation was something real? What if two were cursed, to keep reincarnating, more and more, until they hated each other? Rp with Seliphra
1. Chapter 1

Marciana held her breath as she listened to the guard walk by the hiding place and when he'd gone she gave a quick glance in either direction before hurrying down the steps of her home. It wasn't a castle per say... others might call it as much but in her mind it was small. She reached the small forest clearing soon enough to wait for him.

It was only a few minutes later that Seth arrived. A huge smiled appeared on his face when she saw Marciana. "Did anyone see you? I'm sure no one saw me."

"I don't think so," She rushed happily to him, her arms wrapping around his neck to greet him with a tender kiss.

"I missed you," She murmured. They saw each other all the time... but she had to pretend he was only a stable boy and an old friend.

Seth wrapped his arms around her and nodded as she spoke. "I missed you too. I just... I wish we didn't have to hide like this."

She sighed softly, her head resting on his shoulder, a soft smile on her lips. "As do I..." but she was set to marry another... even then she would not stop seeing him. She couldn't, she loved him with all her heart and soul.

Seth lightly kissed her cheek. "But as long as no one finds out, we can keep meeting like this."

"Forever," She agreed, pressing her lips to his. Probably the worst time then for a curious follower to see them. Seth just deepened the kiss, brushing Marciana's hair out of her face as he did.

She sighed softly and smiled as the parted, though she stayed very much in his arms... it was then she heard someone start running for it and her eyes widened. Had they been seen? She was betrothed to one of the most powerful young lords in the land though...

Seth looked towards where the footsteps were. "Should we part? Pretend that this didn't happen and deny whoever says did?"

She nodded, "We had better," She agreed, but she didn't want to leave him... not when she hadn't even told him... though it might be unwise now to tell Seth that she was pregnant... it would mean a world of trouble for this anyways though she had planned to run away... and ask Seth to come with her.

He gave her one, quick kiss before withdrawing, half running, and half walking back to where he lived. He lived alone. So no one could say he wasn't at home.

Marciana had a more difficult journey and when caught she claimed she had been thirsty and only wished for some water though for that she normally would have called her servant.

"Sir... I have some... troubling news. It's about Marciana."

"What about my betrothed?" The man looked up from the papers he was dealing with.

"She was spotted with another man. It seems as if she snuck out just to see him. And... It was a more intimate visit. With kisses."

The man paused. "What?"

After all, as his betrothed she was to be faithful to him. No other man was to have her the way Seth had already had her numerous times. The person who had informed him gulped. "Exactly as I said, sir. She was with another man. And it seemed as if they were together, though she is supposed to be with you."

The man was furious naturally and early morning she was summoned to him. Marciana was worried... terrified that he knew her secret.

"Marciana..." He started, eyes flicking to her face. "Where were you last night? Your chambers were empty for a period of time."

"I went for a glass of water, my lord," She spoke calmly, no, he couldn't know... please don't let him know!

"It's strange, that you did. Usually, you call for a servant."

"I was restless My Lord, I hoped that the walk would help me sleep," She lied easily enough, her gold eyes locked on the man she was betrothed to.

"Then explain why you were spotted a way away from the grounds." He did know.

"And who was it who spotted me? I swear to you My Lord; I did not leave the castle last night."

"A messenger. One of mine. He is loyal, and says he watched for a few minutes to assure that it was you he saw, and not one similar."

"He must still have been confused then... or not as loyal as you had hoped, my lord." She spoke more stiffly now. She hoped he mistook it for her anger at having her honor questioned though truly she was frightened. For herself, for her lover and for the baby growing inside her already.

The man walked towards Marciana now. "He swears on his life, Marciana. And other servants claim to have seen you enter the castle after midnight."

She backed away, "Exactly what are you accusing me of?" She asked now. Her husband-to-be had always frightened her to a degree, and more so now than ever before.

"I'm accusing you of being unfaithful. And I have the means to tell if you tell the truth or not."

"Is that so... and how do you propose to determine such a thing?" She asked with a small frown. They weren't married yet so if he touched her it was rape, and even he could not avoid the punishment... castration was less than pleasant she had heard.

The man frowned, and roughly grabbed her shoulders. They were alone in his own bedchambers. Before Marciana could say something, he pushed her onto the bed. "You brought this to yourself."

She struggled of course with everything she had but it was no use. She wasn't nearly as strong as he was and though she screamed and cried out, no one came to her aide there... there was no one else around save those very loyal to this man.

Of course, he didn't stop. He just had his way with her. Though, his eyes narrowed, seeing as he entered her too easily for it to be her first time. It angered him.

She ran when she was finally able to... right to her lover and a complete mess. He dress was torn and she was crying, her hair was a mess too, normally tied back neatly as could be.

Seth's eyes widened when he saw her, and he quickly wrapped his arms around her as he brought her in. "What happened?"

"H-he knew, h-he knows!" Was all she could say when she flung her arms around him. They had to leave, and now before he had them hurt... Seth was sure to be executed for some false charge and who would they believe? The most powerful man in the land or a stable boy?

His eyes widened. "He knows?" Seth cursed under his breath. "I have clothes. Normal clothes for you. Change into them, and then we can leave. We have to leave... Right?"

She hiccupped and nodded quietly. They would be destitute for a while, but they would have their lives and each other... and their baby.

The baby that Seth still didn't know about. He nodded and got the outfit. It was a simple dress. Something that he thought the royals wouldn't be able to recognize Marciana in.

Or anyone for that matter. She prayed as much anyways and dressed. "Seth..." She had to tell him now in case it was too late. "I'm pregnant,"

His eyes widened, surprised. "You... Are?" Despite the situation, he smiled. "So we have another reason to get away. Come on." He grabbed Marciana's hand before leading her away. They had to get away. Quickly too.

But it was too late. "Attempting to flee are you" Their path to any horses was blocked and she took Seth's hand in fright, hiding behind him.

Seth blocked Marciana from the men who were blocking them. "What do you mean, flee? I was just going for a walk with my out-of-town relative."

"Lady Marciana is no relative of yours," The guard smirked cruelly and she swallowed. They were going to kill them both, she knew.

Still, Seth persisted. "Lady Marciana? You must be mistaken. This isn't the lady, however much they may look alike. People do have similar looks throughout the world."

"We've been told to arrest you... both of you, so come with us or die here," He said with a smirk.

Seth glanced at Marciana, unsure of what to do. He needed her to live. He'd rather die than let her, even if it was them together. "Why arrest us? What are the charges?"

"You've been charged with rape and attempted kidnapping, and the Lady has been charged with being unfaithful and theft," They smirked.

Seth gulped. The charges were serious ones. Ones he couldn't possibly be able to rebut against. Now, he looked towards Marciana, not knowing what to do.

"We're dead either way with such charges..." She murmured. She hated this... she hated the man who had now done this and she hated that she hadn't run sooner.

It would have saved their and their baby's life. "Should we go with them...? Or die here?"

"We might refute the charges," She said, "Very well, we are entitled to a trial," Though if the judge was their accuser they were dead.

Seth nodded. "That we are. And we both demand one."

"And a trial you shall have." The trial was three days later... and a sham of one at that, a show so others would say there was one. Both were found guilty in the eyes of the Gods and of man and both sentenced to die but there was one other punishment. A curse, something her betrothed did out of pure spite.

Spite because she didn't love him, and she wanted her to suffer. Her and her 'lover'. And it was an evil one at that. They were cursed to reincarnate, lifetime after lifetime but to fail to recognise one another as lovers... and to hate one another until their souls were repulsed by each other as much as they could ever be... and only then would their curse be lifted. Marciana wept when it was placed over them, she hated knowing that she would never again know Seth as her one true love, but to think him her greatest enemy.

And Seth cursed the man, though it got him punched. He didn't want to lose his love, and his child, but they would be. Forever.

Seth was killed first, beheaded for his crimes where Marciana was hanged. It would be eons before their curse broke, over a millennia would pass in fact...


	2. Chapter 2

Shizuo started awake with a frown. He'd had another dream again... they had been strange, all his dreams were. In them he was always someone else, never himself, but he would know someone who he hated as much as he hated Izaya... except it wasn't really Izaya either, it was someone else... who reminded him of Izaya in ways he couldn't explain. And always they had his eyes... red, like Izaya's. He groaned and sat up, getting dressed. He'd had enough... he was going to speak to Celty about this. He texted her to ask if they could talk before heading out to the park after he'd downed some milk.

Celty was already there, seeing as she didn't have a job at the moment. She raised a hand in greeting, when she saw him.

"Hey... do you... dream?" He asked awkwardly when he sat beside her.

Dream? Celty tilted her head to the side before shaking her head. [No. Not that I know of.]

"Oh... most people do... I don't though... not the way other people seem to..." He sighed, "It feels more like remembering..."

[Remembering? Remembering what?]

"I don't know... They just... other people dream about flying and whatever... I dream of hating someone who reminds me of Izaya... every night it's the same, even before I met him."

Celty would have frowned, if she had her head. [How long? Since you were how old?] She had a bit of a theory, and would test it after the blond's answer.

"As long as I can remember... always I guess... you know I used to think I was someone else sometimes? I'd tell my parents it had really happened but none of it did... but I always thought it had..." He frowned a little.

Celty nodded. [Shizuo... I have a theory. Just, let me test it real quick.] She could tell how old a soul was. And, without waiting for an answer, placed her hand on Shizuo's forehead.

Shizuo blinked and eyed her curiously. His soul though was old. Over a thousand years old and it was tired and pained. Something had forced him to reincarnate time and time again after all.

Celty jerked her hand back, surprised. She had never seen or felt a soul so old. Quickly, she started to type. [Shizuo, your soul is over a thousand years old! What you're dreaming are probably past lives.]

"Huh?" Shizuo blinked, "Past lives? So what, reincarnation and stuff?" He didn't have to believe in it for it to happen to him. "So then... the stuff I'm dreaming really did happen?" He asked, frowning. But then this other person... the one like Izaya...

She nodded. [Yeah. I can feel it. There are always new and old souls... But yours was forced to keep coming back, for whatever reason. I don't know why.] She shook her helmet. [Your soul should have rested a long time ago.]

"So... souls don't normally reincarnate? Then this person I keep dreaming of? Is that... Izaya?"

Celty shrugged. [I wouldn't know. I'd have to feel his soul to see. But souls reincarnate for different reasons. At most, it's usually about three or four lifetimes. Yours is over a thousand different lifetimes.]

Shizuo shook his head, "That long huh? So what, something happened in my first life?" He asked. He disliked the notion, but it explained a lot.

Again, she shrugged. [I wouldn't know. Probably. But you're the one with the dreams. It's you who can find out.]

Shizuo nodded. It meant at some point he would see his first life... he had a feeling that was where the truth was.

[Anyway, was that all?]

"Yeah... I guess find out how old Izaya is... if you're willing? I just... know it's him... the eyes... in my dreams... or memories I guess... they're always the same." He was confused by Izaya... he always had been. He hated him but there was this deep longing for him now that hadn't been in his other lives.

Celty nodded. [Yeah. I can try. But I have to put my palm against his forehead, like I did for you. And I really don't think I can trick him into letting me. Unless I break in while he's sleeping.]

Shizuo laughed at that, grinning. "That would be interesting to see," He mused as he stood. "Well, better get going," He wondered if they had reincarnated together like this because they hated each other so much... Celty would have grinned if she could and nodded. Then she waved and walked away. Maybe she could just ask to feel Izaya's forehead.

Shizuo was heading right home, unless Izaya showed up... no... Today he decided that maybe he wouldn't chase Izaya and try to kill him, maybe that was why they kept on reincarnating. He didn't want to actually kill Izaya anymore... and truthfully he wasn't sure he'd ever really wanted t.

Izaya grinned now. He could see the monster. It was great. His enemy was nearby. "Shizu-chan~"

Shizuo blinked. Damn it, he thought of the flea and so the flea turned up; it was like a curse! Shizuo glared at the other, his golden eyes flashing a little as he did so.

Izaya just grinned. "Shizu-chan, not chasing me?" He wanted to chase and hurt the blond.

Shizuo sighed softly, "You know what? No. I've had enough chasing you to last me for this lifetime," He grumbled, walking off now. He didn't feel like it...

Izaya frowned. That wasn't what was supposed to happen. Not at all. He narrowed his eyes lightly. "What's this? The monster wants to pretend to be human. No no no no." That wasn't how it worked at all. Now, Izaya pulled out one of his knives from his pockets and threw it at Shizuo.

Shizuo dodged it enough that it left only a light line on one arm. "Aren't you tired of the fighting yet?" Shizuo asked with a light glare. If he was right than he and Izaya had about five lives a century, though he knew they probably hadn't made it to adult hood every time. But over a thousand years... over one and a half millennia they had been fighting and he, for one, was tired of fighting.

Izaya scowled now. Tired of fighting? "Never, Shizu-chan." He threw another three knives. He wanted to play with the beast. If Izaya wanted to keep fighting... maybe whatever this infernal loop was then they would be stuck in forever. Shizuo took one knife to his left arm, the other two leaving scratches on him but he still didn't throw something heavy. Instead he shook his head and walk away. Probably the opposite of what Izaya predicted but what did he care now?

Izaya's scowl deepened. That was it? No! The beast was supposed to yell and throw something at him. Hate him! Not just act like... like he was now! But what was he supposed to do? If he couldn't get Shizuo angry by fighting, then how could he? Usually Shizuo was angry just when he arrived.

Today though he had enough on his mind to keep his temper at bay. He wondered vaguely if his temper had grown from life time to life time and he had trouble now because he had a thousand years worth of frustration in his soul. But there was something missing too... he couldn't remember finding love now that he was remembering his lives. Only pain... that made him feel more tired.

Izaya ended up just huffing and turning back towards Shinjuku. Fine. He'd just bother the blond when he did get angry.

But this night Shizuo's memory changed everything. He dreamed he was afraid... a woman again, he always seemed to be much to his annoyance, but he was afraid... and this time it was for the person with Izaya's eye's. He dreamed they were on trial -not much of one though- and then executed. The other person first and him second but he dreamed that he was crying... and begging them, telling them they mustn't kill him... err... her he supposed. He woke when he died in the dream, he always did but he was left shaking. Was that his first life? Then they had been cursed... because he and Izaya had been in love? The thought was almost revolting in a way but on another level he wondered if that was the key to resting... to finally being happy. For them to fall in love a second time.

However, Izaya still hated the blond. He didn't know. Though, Izaya did dream of his past lives, just as Shizuo did. He, though, thought they were just nightmares. Especially since he didn't have them every night.

Shizuo was done hating him though. His soul remembered now, it knew and he knew and he could remember more and more of each life every day. It was a bit odd to remember things from thousands of years ago but he could.

Izaya was pacing his office. Namie hadn't arrived yet. Which was good. Because he didn't want her to be there at the moment. "I can't believe it! How the hell does Shizu-chan keep annoying me? He's supposed to be a mindless brute! To just attack me as I run and enjoy the chase!" It was irritating and pissing him off.

Namie arrived just then and blinked, "What's got your panties in a knot?" She asked, frowning a little. When Izaya was upset he would make life harder on her.

He glared at her. "Shizu-chan's been ignoring me."

"Oh, is that all," She rolled her eyes, "Take your boyfriend on a date then," She joked.

Izaya narrowed his eyes a bit more. "He isn't my boyfriend, and that's not how I feel about him."

"You sure? Because you are kind-of obsessed with him," She pointed out, "Besides which you go on and on about him some days... you sound like you're in love with him half the time."

Izaya scoffed and shook his head. "That's just because Shizu-chan is something fun. Of course I'm sure."

"Right... you probably don't even know you're in love then," She shook her head. "You have your meeting with Asami-san today, don't forget it." She grunted. Asami was the one who got Izaya into being an informant in the first place... and Namie was certain he was warping the other constantly too.

Izaya grinned and nodded. "Ah yes. Asami. Thank you for reminding me, Namie." That lifted his spirits. If Asami hadn't met him, then he likely wouldn't have been able to learn as much about his humans as he had.

He would have lived a relatively good life in fact, but that was not what Asami wanted. In truth the man hated Izaya and he had remembered each life he'd been in too... if he reincarnated it meant the curse would break if he didn't fight to keep them hating each other. Asami arrived in under an hour, smirking when he saw the one before him. To think that a stable boy had gotten so far... then again this was a hundred lives later. "Izaya-san, good to see you,"

Izaya just nodded. "Yes yes. It's nice to see you too, Asami-san. Care for a drink or something to eat? And have a seat."

Asami sat but he could tell there was something wrong too. "Something is bothering you," He said lightly as he watched the other, "I heard a rumour that Shizuo Heiwajima is calming down." He added, hoping to goad the other into telling him.

Izaya narrowed his eyes slightly, but nodded with a sigh before sitting down. "He seems to be. I don't like it. Shizu-chan's supposed to be a beast and a monster, not a human." He pouted then.

At least one hated the other, "Maybe you're just not trying hard enough to make him angry?" Asami suggested. He knew though that it was a bad sign. Marciana's soul had gotten gradually angrier as the lives went on and this one was her most enraged incarnation... and the first time she'd been born male.

"Not trying hard enough?" Izaya sighed lightly. "I don't know what to do to make him angry. It's so frustrating." He shook his head. "Do you have any ideas on how to make him mad?"

"I imagine you have tried hurting him... what about trying to have your way with him?" Asami suggested lightly. Izaya had raped before in other lives, always the same victim too... why not this one? It was sure to kill Izaya and he knew Shizuo would kill himself soon after.

Izaya blinked. "Have my way with him? Asami-san, how would I go about that? Shizu-chan still has his strength. And it'd pretty hard to go about that." He sighed lightly. Though it wasn't a bad idea at all. If he went through with it, Shizuo would likely never ignore him again.

"Easy enough. Tell him you want to make peace with him, get him drunk. He won't put up a fight like that," He smirked.

Izaya grinned. Yes, that was perfect. "I see. So call him up and bring a bunch of sweet alcoholic drinks over. Shizu-chan does hate bitter things. Now then, enough of my problems, Asami-san. You wanted a meeting, so what did you come here for?"

Asami chuckled lightly. That had been it honestly, but he knew visiting Izaya would mean he needed a job for the sly informant. "I need you to find someone, it should be easy enough for you," He said. "Her name is Anri, I just need to know if she's alive or dead," He didn't give half a hoot about the name he'd spouted.

Izaya nodded. "Her? If you mean Anri Sonohara, then yes. I know she's alive. She's an interesting one." With Saika.

"Alright, how much do I owe you?" He asked. He would go with that Anri, sure, why the hell not.

"Ah. No no. You gave me some advice. That's payment enough for this time, Asami-san."

"As you wish Izaya-san. Thank you for the information," He smiled. 'And thank you for making her hate you again' he thought before he took his leave.

Izaya just grinned and waved as Asami left. Ah yes, he was in a much better mood now. Still grinning, he left his apartment for a liquor store there in Shinjuku. Why not do it tonight?


	3. Chapter 3

Shizuo was at home most of the evening tonight anyways. he had a feeling they were near the limit... but this time he would make sure it ended differently... he could feel the soul that had cursed them though he hadn't seen them... if he did he would snap their neck for this.

After purchasing the alcohol, Izaya flipped open his phone and dialed Shizuo, grinning as he did. After this, they could continue with their game. All thanks to Asami.

Shizuo blinked when his phone rang. 'Unknown Number' it read but he knew exactly who it was. "Yeah?" He said when he picked up, staring at the ceiling.

"Shizu-chan~ Know how you asked me if I was tired fighting? Well, I am. Just had to think about it."

He knew the other was lying but that was fine, he needed Izaya's plan anyways for his own to work.

"Is that so..." Shizuo said, frowning softly. Izaya probably planned to rape him... again not that Izaya knew he'd done it before... but it wasn't going to be this time.

"Yeah. It is." He grinned, not thinking that the other knew what he was planning. "That's why I bought some drinks, sweet, like you like~ Can I come over?"

So that was the plan? Get him drunk... "Sure..." He agreed, but only after a moment's pause. He had to sound a little uncertain.

Izaya grinned. Perfect! "Alright Shizu-chan~ Don't leave your home. I'll be there shortly." And with that, he hung up and started on his way towards the blond's home.

Shizuo let him in when he arrived and he drank some but he acted some of his drunkenness too when he was getting tipsy. He had decent tolerance at least, but he could pretend it was lower.

Izaya grinned when he noticed that Shizuo was acting drunk. Perfect. It was like Asami had said. Now, he scooted just a bit closer to Shizuo. This would be good.

Shizuo didn't force him away either, he would allow every touch... because this way it was consensual for the first time in a very long time... and that had to mean something.

Izaya grinned a bit more as he placed one hand on Shizuo's right cheek. This was going to be great. Then, he leaned forward to connect their lips together.

He stiffened for a moment before he relaxed, allowing Izaya to do what he wanted. He was nervous... scared even but he remembered their first life now too... and in that one he'd been happy to give his body to the other so he kissed back.

Izaya grinned into the kiss as he started to push Shizuo down and climbed over him. His hands roamed Shizuo's sides.

Shizuo leaned back, letting Izaya do everything he wanted. He would not stop the other, if anything he started exploring too, his hands running up the others back.

Izaya grinned a bit more, figuring that this would make the other even angrier after the fact. He slipped his hands up under Shizuo's vest and shirt, feeling his toned chest now.

Shizuo gave a light whine in response, his breathe beginning to deepen. In a way this was exciting too, they were finally having consensual sex after a thousand years even if Izaya still didn't remember. Shizuo had a feeling he would soon.

Izaya grinned a bit more as he pulled his hands away in order to unbutton Shizuo's vest. He thought that this would still get the blond angry after.

If Shizuo really had been drunk it might... or if he didn't remember their first life... the one that started all of this... and those memories were the strongest from all the lives between this one and the first, all the other memories of hate and death merely blurring together into on millennia he'd rather forget now that he remembered it.

Izaya pulled Shizuo's vest off and threw it to the side as he worked on the other's shirt now. He was grinning as he did so, thinking that he had won this battle.

He hadn't. In fact for once Izaya was falling right into Shizuo's plan... and neither he nor the man who wanted them to hate one another was going to win this time. No, Shizuo wanted to win this time, he needed it, and he knew they both did and if he could break the cycle long enough for Izaya to remember...

Izaya smiled when he got the other's shirt unbuttoned before running his hands along Shizuo's chest again. HIs hands running over the blond's nipples as he did.

"Mnn~" Shizuo grunted again, and now he reached and got the other's shirt off him now, the jacket too, both articles in the pile on the floor.

Izaya grinned and moved down, to plant kissed down Shizuo's chest, his hands lightly squeezing Shizuo's nipples as he did.

Shizuo's breath hitched and he closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling. His legs moved too now, one hooking around Izaya's hips to pull him down the other to one side to accommodate the informant between his legs.

Izaya hummed now. This was going perfectly. Or so he thought. One hand stayed at the left nipple, squeezing and rolling it, as the other moved down to Shizuo's hemline. He traced the skin there before his hand moved to the button of the blond's pants.

Shizuo's nerves were rising now, he had enough poor experiences with sex in the last five centuries to leave fear in his system... if Izaya didn't prepare him he'd put a stop to it.

Izaya wouldn't be that mean. He wanted the other angry with him, not intent of purely killing him. Izaya's hand moved away from Shizuo's nipple to pull the other's pants off.

Shizuo even rolled his hips to help the pants come off. He hoped Izaya mistook his nervousness as drunkenness.

He did. After all, he had no reason to suspect that the other wasn't drunk and was willing. "Mmm. Shizu-chan." His eyes glinted as he ran his hand along Shizuo's thigh.

The blonde grinned nervously, pulling the other's mouth to his again. He wanted this... that helped his nerves.

Izaya just chuckled as he kissed the other, his tongue slipping into Shizuo's mouth. HIs hands continued to run along the other's thigh, teasing him.

It worked, Shizuo was getting hard like this and he moved his hips against Izaya's both to display his arousal and to give Izaya some friction too, hoping it would get the other to give him more. Izaya groaned a bit as he looked up Shizuo. He had to finish this quick. He pulled away from the kiss before offering three fingers to the blond. Izaya doubted that Shizuo had lube.

He didn't. He took the fingers in his mouth, sucking them and letting his tongue flick around each to get them coated. Izaya closed his eyes and let out small moan. He moved his fingers around the other's mouth, making sure to get them coated. Shizuo trembled lightly with anticipation, though it was partly nerves too. His boxers felt way too tight now and he wondered if Izaya's pants were there too.

Izaya grinned and pulled his hand away from Shizuo's mouth. His other hand pulled Shizuo's boxers down. This... Oh it would be good. One finger went in, and he moved it around. It would be good... but not how Izaya imagined it. He had no idea Shizuo was very much in his right mind and letting this happen because he wanted it to. Shizuo let out a low hiss and rested his head against the arm of the couch, his legs adjusting to allow Izaya the best access.

Izaya moved that one finger around for a few minutes before the second went in, and he scissored them. "Feel good, Shizu-chan?" He smirked a bit. Shizuo didn't dare answer, closing his eyes with a low whine instead. It hurt a little but in a good way and not nearly as much as losing female virginity did. The fact that he knew that felt weird... then he remembered this was the first time he'd ever been male.

Izaya didn't know that, or even know that reincarnation existed. He grinned and inserted the third finger, and spread them all apart. He couldn't wait, thinking he'd have Shizuo hate him again. But Shizuo was after something else. He knew more than just this was needed, but he wanted the opposite. He wanted Izaya to fall in love with him.

It wasn't something Izaya would just do. But if Shizuo didn't hate him, it was bound to happen. Finally, Izaya pulled his fingers out, and undid his own pants, freeing his erection. He didn't wait before thrusting into Shizuo, and started to move before Shizuo even gave the okay.

That hurt a little... he could make Izaya regret it later. He managed to relax a little around the other before long and soon enough he was starting to feel good too.

Izaya didn't wait for the other to adjust because still didn't think that the other was actually consensual. He just wanted things to be like they had been. Izaya groaned as he continued to move. It felt amazing inside the other. Shizuo gave a soft moan now, adjusting his hips lightly. The small action wound up leaving him nearly blind from the pleasure he suddenly received and a loud moan escaped him.

Izaya chuckled a bit. Yes. This was what he wanted. The other to humiliate himself so that he had to be angry and try to kill him. "Shizu-chan's so shameful."

Except Shizuo felt too good right now to care about anything, and he'd feel better as he went on... "Mmmn~! Ah! Th-there..." He gasped out as the spot inside him was hit repeatedly now.

Izaya let out a small moan as he thrusted. Ah, it felt amazing. He felt like he'd come soon. But he'd have to keep going until Shizuo did. To make this complete. Izaya didn't have to wait long; Shizuo came soon enough and hard, splattering his release on Izaya's abdomen along with his own.

Izaya just groaned again, his eyes closing as he thrusted deep before releasing. It felt amazing. Everything. He had to go now though. Before Shizuo sobered up.

Shizuo knew Izaya was going to leave him. He didn't want that though... he wanted him to stay... there was one thing though... they were still connected, still closer than they ever had been in this life so Shizuo stared right into Izaya's eyes. Their eyes had remained the same in every life... he hoped it triggered memories for Izaya but it was all he could do too.

Izaya frowned a bit, as he stared at Shizuo's golden eyes. It was... familiar. But not because they were Shizuo's eyes. He frowned a bit more before shaking his head and pulling out. This was crazy. He grabbed his clothes and pulled then on, laughing as he used Shizuo's shirt to wipe the cum off his chest. "That was fun, Shizu-chan." He smirked before leaving, skipping to his apartment, thinking he had won.

Shizuo rolled over and watched quietly, hoping Izaya just thought he was drunk and not mildly irritated. No, he had to keep in mind that Izaya didn't remember... he knew the man he had loved all those centuries ago was in there somewhere... probably buried under masks and falsities and whatever else whoever was warping Izaya had made sure was there.

There was something in the back of Izaya's mind that did know. However, it wasn't acknowledged at all. In fact, it was pushed farther away than the back of his mind by his confused soul and the twisting of his personality. As well as by Asami.

Shizuo would dig it out... he would win, he had to. He stayed on the couch for a while, before getting up, throwing his clothes in the washing machine and showering. He knew if they'd been in bed Izaya probably would have made sure the sheets got ruined... good thing it was just his cheap couch.

That was because Izaya had counted on that being enough to make Shizuo mad at him. He arrived back home in a good mood. Namie was sent home and he got ready for bed.


	4. Chapter 4

Come the next day Shizuo called in sick, he never had so he knew Tom wouldn't mind too much. He was at work the day after good as new though he was worried about what Izaya would try next now that this hadn't worked.

Izaya didn't know it didn't work. Not yet. He hadn't seen the blond the day before, and was now looking for him. "Shizu-chan~ Where are you?"

Shizuo was walking behind Tom, lost in thought as he finished his smoke. He was wondering if Izaya dreamed about his past lives... if he knew what they even were. He kept dreaming his first life now though, once that had surfaced nothing could hold it back...

Izaya grinned when he saw the blond. "Shizu-chan!" He grinned even more, thinking that the blond would chase him now.

Shizuo blinked at the name and turned to look but he made no action to chase Izaya either, much to everyone else's surprise including Tom's.

Izaya growled a bit. Still, he wasn't? "Shizu-chan got cold feet or something?" He taunted it from a bit away, not wanting to be close to Shizuo if he did go berserk. However, if the blond didn't do anything, he'd have to head home without winning the game.

"That's a metaphor for weddings," Shizuo replied with a small smirk. He was going to avoid using his brute strength this time.

Izaya narrowed his eyes. "That's not how I meant it, Shizu-chan."

"Shoulda picked a different metaphor then, huh?" Shizuo kept walking now. He acted like nothing had happened between them at all.

Izaya growled a bit. This wasn't what he wanted. Not at all. Huffing, he turned and walked back to his place. It hadn't worked.

Shizuo had left Izaya the one fuming and angry... that felt good in a way but he wanted more. He wanted Izaya to remember who they had been...

Once he got home, he sent Namie home. He wasn't in the mood for her. Now then... Who knew the brute? Celty did. She could help. Maybe? Scowling, he texted her. [Get over here. I have some questions about the brute.]

Celty sighed internally but headed over. This would be a chance to see if Shizuo was right.

Which he was. Izaya was impatient as he waited for Celty to arrive. He needed to know why Shizuo wasn't getting angry at him.

She was there soon enough. [What do you want?] She asked. She knew Izaya didn't remember as much as Shizuo did probably. Shizuo's soul was probably just more tired than Izaya's was.

"Shizu-chan hasn't been getting angry at me at all lately. Do you know why?"

[I have a theory... can I touch your forehead to see if I'm right?] She asked knowing it sounded strange.

Izaya gave her a strange look. "Touch my forehead?" It was silly and strange. But oh well. Izaya sighed. "Fine. If it's your theory."

She pressed one hand where she needed to and then felt... Izaya's soul was just as old as Shizuo's... had lived the same number of lives. [Do you have strange dreams at all?] She asked now.

"Huh?" Izaya frowned a bit. Strange dreams? He scoffed then. "Sometimes. If I don't get enough sleep."

[Dreams where you are someone else and fighting another? Hurting them sometimes? Hating someone with Shizuo's eyes?]

Izaya scowled, but nodded. Yeah. He did, when he dreamed that.

[You and Shizuo have lived one hundred lives. This is the hundred and first life you have lived, your soul is well over a millennia old. Shizuo doesn't want to fight because he's the one who usually dies I think]

Izaya's face showed confusion. "Souls over a millennial old? What are you spouting, Celty. Reincarnation doesn't exist."

[It does, but only under rare circumstances. Most souls are new, but you've been reincarnating for centuries now. Over a millennia in fact.] She type out, [Shizuo remembers his more easily I think... you might try being nice to him for once]

Izaya frowned. Remembered? He laughed then, and shook his head. "Celty, I'm not going to be nice to Shizu-chan. Why should I? He's a beast and we're supposed to hate each other." His eyes narrowed lightly.

[Whatever you say] She said, [But that's why Shizuo won't fight you, he doesn't want to anymore. Nothing you do is going to get him to try and kill you again]

Izaya scowled. Shizuo wouldn't try to kill him again? No. He had to. That's how they worked. "Fine. Go away." He frowned. No... He just had to think of something. Something better.

Shizuo was going to try soon too; he had no idea how to try it though.

Izaya sighed. This wasn't working. Shizuo was supposed to be a monster. He couldn't just stop. That wasn't how it worked. _Maybe Asami can help me..._ He'd have to call the other to see if he had any ideas.

Asami would be only too happy to help; he wanted them to hate each other too after all. He suggested this time something much riskier. "You could attack him directly. He'll have to defend himself." and if not then they had killed one another again.

Izaya frowned lightly, but nodded. "Yeah. I guess so. I guess that that's what I have to do every time I see Shizu-chan. Thanks Asami~ I'll start tomorrow, seeing as its late now. Night~" And he hung up.

Oh Shizuo would defend himself but he was done with hate. He had the next day off and was basking in the sun in south Ikebukuro Park.

Izaya glared at the blond from a distance. It wasn't as fun when he initiated it. He pulled out four knives and threw them all towards Shizuo before charging. His flickblade open and ready to attack the other.

Shizuo hissed when one knife hit him in the shoulder and he moved fast. He wasn't going to just let Izaya kill him in this life; nothing would change if he did. He watched the other carefully. Wait for Izaya to get close and then...

Izaya ran up to the blond, getting much closer then he would have liked as he went to slash the other along his chest.

Shizuo was prepared to take a knife and his arms came around to trap Izaya. He lunged at the last second only, he knew it meant injury to himself, but he would catch the idiot too.

Izaya let out a yelp of surprise when Shizuo's arms wrapped around him, trapping him. His eyes widened a bit. Shit! When had the blond grown brains?

When he'd remembered everything; that was when. Fifteen centuries or so of memories... it gave him more than Izaya had. His arms locked, trapping Izaya now. He picked the other right up and headed for the nearest alley. They needed privacy for this... he ignored the throb in his side where Izaya's knife was lodged.

Of course, Izaya thrashed about. "Let me go you brute!" He didn't want to be trapped like he was. He wanted the other to chase him and him to attack the blond man. This was all wrong!

"I will, we gotta talk first..." Shizuo grumbled. Once in the alley he did set Izaya down but he held the other's arm firmly to stop the other getting away.

Izaya narrowed his eyes at the other and tried to pull away. Of course, it did nothing but cause him a bit of pain. Shizuo's grip was iron. "Fine. What do you want to talk about?" It was strange.

Shizuo frowned at that... how to bring this up... "You so desperate for me to hate you again that you'll do what I do?" He asked, somewhat annoyed.

Izaya frowned lightly, but nodded. "If you mean attack you like I just did, yes." That's how it was supposed to be like.

Except it wasn't supposed to be like that, "And you tried getting me drunk," Shizuo frowned now. He had a feeling Izaya was starting to think Shizuo didn't even remember what happened. Izaya blinked, surprised by that statement. Tried to? So he wasn't? His brow furled then. Shizuo remembered it and it did nothing?

"I wasn't drunk Izaya... I was willing," and that changed a lot didn't it? Shizuo hoped so.

Izaya frowned. The blond was willing? Something in the back of his mind was glad, but the front of his mind blocked that out. "Shizu-chan was willing? Why?" His voice showed his suspicion.

How to explain it without telling Izaya that they were lovers a hundred lifetimes ago? "Because I don't hate you." He said simply.

Izaya scowled and tried to yank his arm away again. "Well I hate you, Shizu-chan."

"Do you? Then why haven't you killed me yet?" He asked, his eyes glaring lightly.

"Because Shizu-chan is my toy." It was a simple enough answer. One he had had forever.

"Then what's the problem with playing a new game?" He finally asked. If that was what it took he would do it... he wanted their life to be good again, to be happy... because if they managed that they got to rest.

Izaya frowned a bit more. "A new game?" Like what? What could possibly make him feel like things were normal again?

"A game where we try at something else... we don't try to kill each other, we try at a relationship..." He hoped providing it like a game would make Izaya more willing.

Again, Izaya furrowed his brow. "Why would playing a relationship be a game, Shizu-chan? What does it offer me?"

"Sex," Shizuo shrugged, "Control." Izaya had already dominated him once and Shizuo had rather enjoyed it.

Izaya put one finger to his chin, thinking. Sex and control of the other... That did sound tempting. "Fine. But I don't have to stay after unless I want to." He meant the sex. Just because he agreed to this didn't mean that he liked the blond.

"Fine," Shizuo agreed. It was a start... Enough of this Izaya might remember who they had been. He hoped.

"Now let me go." He yanked his arm back again, hoping that this time, Shizuo would let go. "I want to go home." He had work to do.

Shizuo released him. "You already have my number... call me," He said before heading for Shinra's. He needed this knife removed, it really hurt.

Izaya huffed. Call him? Yeah. He'd do that when he felt like he needed a fuck. For now, he just headed back to his loft in Shinjuku, to get work done.

Shizuo was fine getting no calls for a while, he knew that he was setting himself up too... if this failed he'd be left alone and in pain until he died again.


	5. Chapter 5

Three days later, Izaya dialed up Shizuo's number. He felt like having some fun with the blond. Izaya had also bought a bottle of lube, which was in his coat pocket. Now, he waited for Shizuo to pick up.

"Yeah?" Shizuo picked up, recognizing the number and he knew what it would be about too.

"I'm coming over, Shizu-chan. For our game. So be ready." With that, he hung up and started on his way to Ikebukuro.

Shizuo sighed and hung up. Thank goodness he was just finishing up. He hung the man upside down until he paid up then dropped him unceremoniously. "Gotta go Tom," He said next, saying goodbye to his boss before heading home. He smoked on the way there, knowing he would need one.

Izaya was grinning as he arrived. Ah, this would be wonderful~ He would get to have sex with the monster of Ikebukuro, and control him too. This would be fun. "Shizu-chan~"

Shizuo let him into the apartment quietly. "Want something to drink?" He offered.

"No. I'm here for our game, Shizu-chan." Izaya smirked a bit. Really, this would be just sex. Yet Shizuo was the one who suggested it.

Shizuo grunted, "Don't expect me to just bend over, you have to get me there too," Shizuo frowned a little at the other.

Izaya sighed lightly. "Shizu-chan. Get there how? Small talk isn't going to cut it. Can't I just tease you until then?" He grinned as he brushed his lips up against Shizuo's.

Shizuo nodded quietly. That was what he meant... foreplay... this was going to hurt... not physically really, though he did still have stitches in his side from Izaya's knife. He knew what he was getting himself into though; he knew the risks if this failed...

Izaya just grinned a bit as he started to unbutton the blond's vest. "Shizu-chan should be glad to hear that I went out and bought a bottle of lube, seeing as you probably didn't think to."

He flushed a little at that... he hadn't thought to and he knew Izaya would be opposed to a condom too. Not that it mattered; Shizuo finally had a body that couldn't conceive... so he thought.

Izaya chuckled lightly at Shizuo's slightly flushed face. It was actually a bit adorable. "Hm. Shizu-chan, I don't think it's best to _play_ standing up, don't you think?" It'd be much easier to tease the blond laying down, or against something. Shizuo wished this was more than a game to Izaya... but he knew he had to get through this to end up where he wanted to be so he took Izaya and led him to the bedroom.

Izaya just grinned as Shizuo did. And when they arrived, he pulled the bottle of lube out of his coat pocket before setting in on the bedside table. His jacket fell silently to the ground. Smirking, he pushed Shizuo down now.

Shizuo let Izaya do it... he moved onto the bed so that they were properly on it too, his gold eyes locked on the other.

Izaya didn't really care that Shizuo was. He was just going to have his fun. Slowly, he pulled of Shizuo's vest, seeing as it was already unbuttoned, before unbuttoning the first few buttons on the top of Shizuo's shirt. Just enough for the top half of his torso to be showing. Slowly, he traced his fingers around the flesh, ignoring the blond's nipples for now.

Shizuo remained motionless for a moment before tugging at Izaya's shirt, getting it over the flea's head.

Izaya grinned and let him. After his shirt was off, he started to kiss along the exposed part of Shizuo's torso, one finger slowly tracing its way to the blond's left nipple.

Shizuo gave Izaya a whine though it was a little exadurated. He wasn't feeling amazing, not yet... and his emotional level was putting a bit of a damper on his libido...

Izaya had his way with the blond, cleaned himself up with Shizuo's shirt after, got dressed and left. All it was, sex. This went on for a few weeks. Almost every day.

"Bye-bye, Shizu-chan~" He smirked as he got dressed and left. Ah, how fun it was to play with the blond.

Shizuo waited until Izaya was gone before he let the first tear escape him. He'd made no progress and Izaya took him nearly every day... and then there was another matter. He'd discovered just a week ago that he really was different... he wasn't sure if it was this body or because he'd been a woman a hundred times but he was pregnant. Izaya was going to be a father and he had no way to tell him.

Just then, there was knock on the door. A slightly worried knock. Celty wasn't worried enough to break in... But she did see Izaya leave Shizuo's apartment. And he was in a good mood. It made her wonder if Shizuo was alright.

Shizuo hiccupped and sat up. Who could that be? He didn't want anyone to see him like this... he pulled boxers on and wiped himself off before peeking through the peep hole... Celty. He let her in but he was struggling to hold the tears at bay.

She knew something was wrong when she saw the sadness in Shizuo's eyes and how he was struggling to avoid crying. [Shizuo... What's wrong? What happened?]

He sat down after he closed the door again and swallowed. "W-why doesn't he r-remember like I do?" He asked but his voice was shaky, betraying every emotion he felt.

For just a moment, before she started to type, Celty wrapped her arms around Shizuo. She knew what he was talking about. His and Izaya's past lives.

[It could be that he just doesn't know yet. When I felt how old his soul was, I also asked about if he had any strange dreams. He said only if he didn't get enough sleep. While you've been having them every night since you can remember.]

Shizuo hiccupped lightly, "I'm p-pregnant..." He said next, "he doesn't care about me a-and I'm p-pregnant," Celty was the first person he even told.

If she could, her eyes would have widened. [P-pregnant? But, Shizuo you're a guy!] Her surprise took hold for a moment when she typed that; else she would have tried to comfort him.

"I didn't say I knew how," He pointed out with another hiccup. "M-maybe it's because I've been female in every other life, maybe its b-because I'm different anyways, stronger than e-everyone else..." He shook his head.

Celty slowly nodded. Yeah. Maybe.

[I guess that makes sense. But Shizuo, have you told Izaya? That might make a difference.]

"I don't kn-know how..." He admitted, "I mean w-would he even believe me? W-what if he still hates me?" He asked.

Again, Celty wrapped her arms around Shizuo before going to type.

[I can tell him if you want. He'll have to believe me. And if he still hates you, then I'll just use my shadows to keep him here to care for you. That way, he's bound to learn about you and start to actually care.]

Shizuo grinned despite himself at that and hugged her back. "Thanks... I should tell him though... y-you'll be here?" He asked, sending a text to Izaya... 'come back' it said. He hoped Izaya mistook it to mean Shizuo just wanted more sex.

Izaya grinned a bit. That is how he took it. _Shizu-chan is an eager one, isn't he?_ He laughed lightly, and turned towards the blond's house. _Maybe I made him addicted to me. That'd be something beautiful~ _Soon enough, he arrived, and turned the knob, letting himself in.

Celty was still there though and Shizuo was obviously still upset, though he wasn't crying now.

He would wait until Izaya closed the door though and Celty was going to drag him back in if he ran.

Izaya closed the door and glanced up at the two. Celty was there? Oh. So this probably wasn't for another round. "So Shizu-chan, why did you need me?" His voice was a bit cold, seeing as he thought that he was wasting time.

Shizuo was going to be very blunt about this; beating around the bush wasn't his style.

"I'm pregnant." He said with a frown. His expression and tone were dead serious too; he didn't want Izaya to think he was kidding.

Izaya scowled. Pregnant? His eyes narrowed slightly as he stared at the two of them. "I don't see how you are. You're male." Though he didn't say he didn't believe the other.

"Hell if I know... maybe it's because I'm different," He wasn't going to tack on that he was a male in only one out of one hundred lives.

Izaya scowled lightly before turning to leave. Who cared? Who cared if the blond was somehow pregnant?

"You're going to be helping," Shizuo said. He wasn't giving Izaya an option. "It's yours,"

Izaya's scowl deepened. He didn't want a kid. Or even to actually be with Shizuo. "I don't want a kid, Shizu-chan."

Shizuo snorted, "You really don't remember anything..." He murmured, "Or not the right things... or maybe you don't believe what it is... I don't care anymore... we'll be stuck in this life and the next, and the next... I give up..."

Izaya frowned and turned back around to face Shizuo. "What are you talking about?" For the moment, he decided to ignore Celty. She wasn't doing anything.

"Our first life... or our second... or our ninety-ninth... me, no, I remember every time you killed me and the reason we've been hating each other for fifteen fucking centuries but you get to be blissfully unaware!" Shizuo was upset... his mood had swung again.

Now, Izaya had a confused expression on his face. What? Was that that reincarnation thing Celty had been going on about? But he didn't really know anything. Weird dreams sometimes, but not regular or anything.

"We got cursed you idiot!" Shizuo finally snapped, "because of some jealous prick that reincarnates whenever we're too close to remembering everything like I did! He's probably back again and every time he goes after you and warps you into something evil, he convinces you to kill me or rape me or take advantage of me and you do it every time like a blind dog!"

Izaya frowned. It was a strange thought. Though, his mind did go to Asami. He had suggested raping the blond and attacking him directly. And he would have raped the other if he hadn't been willing. Izaya frowned a bit more as he thought about it. He did become an informant because of that man too. Feared by most and hated by even his blood siblings. So... was this possible?

But if reincarnation was real, then what about the no afterlife he believed in?

"We can't even rest and move on to the next world until this damn thing breaks... we're not supposed to have lived this many times but we can't because we think we're supposed to hate each other when we aren't!" Shizuo wanted to cry.

Again, Izaya's frown deepened. Was there an afterlife? If there was... Would he be in a good one? Really, the raven didn't like how Shizuo kept saying things to confuse him.

"I'll stay tonight. Convince me or I'm leaving." Because he was skeptical. But it deserved a chance. Especially when it seemed genuine.

Shizuo just glared, "Convince you or what part?" He asked. He doubted he could but if they could have a nice long talk then maybe Izaya would remember...

"Just convince me of something, Shizu-chan."

"Fine... suite yourself..." He muttered, wiping the tears in the corner of his eyes away now.

Izaya didn't stop frowning as he made his way to the couch and plopped down. He didn't like this. He hated this. And really, he just wanted it to stop. Which was why he had decided to stay for Shizuo to try and convince him. "Celty, I don't see what you're still doing here."

She got up. [I'll leave now...][Shizuo if you need me call me.] She added and headed off when he nodded.

Izaya sighed lightly and closed his eyes. Why did this have to happen? Why couldn't he just live like he was supposed to? It'd be so much easier if Shizuo still hated him.

Except they weren't supposed to hate each other. They were never meant to hate each other... "Do you want to know... about any of our lives?" He remembered each of his right up to when he died... only five times had he died after Izaya had though.

"Not really. But you're supposed to be convincing me of something. Anything. So go ahead."

"Fine... then... in every life we have the same eyes... and in every life you've been male... I'm the only one who switched..."

Izaya rolled his eyes, but didn't interrupt. Yeah. If this was all true, then maybe that was why the blond got pregnant.

"In fact... this is the first time I'm male..." Shizuo flushed lightly when he said that, averting his gaze.

"I see. Go on. Go on." It was obvious that he wasn't very interested.

"In our first life we were in love..." He said now... wondering if that might get a reaction at least.

Izaya flicked his eyes in Shizuo's direction, seeing as he wasn't actually facing the blond. The eyes lingered for a moment before looking away. "So?"

"You got me pregnant in that life too you know... we met in secret... we weren't supposed to be in love, I was supposed to marry a lord... the richest man in the area... it was a good match but I loved you more... even if you were just a stable boy..."

Izaya scoffed at that. If reincarnation was true, then there was no way that he was something as lowly as a stable boy while Shizuo was going to marry a lord.

Though something small in the back of his mind started to become active.

"We grew up together too... your father worked for my father and you were to work for my younger brother when he came of age and my father died... but... " Shizuo frowned softly as he remembered another life's memories.

Izaya just rolled his eyes. Yeah. Yeah. Sure. Really, he was just in a foul mood from having to stay and deal with the blond.

"They spotted us... my fiancé raped me for proof that I'd been unfaithful and then had us both arrested on false charges when we tried to flee... he's the one who cursed us... paid a powerful witch for it... she warned him against it, a curse like this is rare and powerful... she told him he would not rest either, and each of his lives would be misery even after you and I found peace... They did it anyways. They killed you first... beheading... they made me watch it... then they hanged me even though I pleaded for my life... for the life of my baby at the very least..." He frowned a little and curled up. He wondered if this was the same baby that had tried to be born in their first life, finally coming in this one.

It could very well be. Again, Izaya rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah. Alright." He still didn't seem to believe Shizuo, but his voice was less cold.

"One day you'll remember too... every time I died before you I've seen you remember... and when you died before me I would remember. Whoever died first was killed by the other... and whoever died second committed suicide to follow them into the grave." It was a depressing hundred lives he'd lived. He was determined not to be the killer at least in this life.

"Tch." He couldn't see himself committing suicide. Not for a past Shizuo, at least. Maybe to keep his sisters safe or something. But not because of Shizuo

Except he had ninety eight times before. "With each life you become more warped and cruel to me and I become angrier and more violent... and this time I was born stronger than you for once..." He didn't know why... he was stronger but he still felt docile... loving and tender too though he figured after being female ninety nine times it was no surprise that something had rubbed off on his soul.

Again, Izaya just rolled his eyes. "Yeah. Because that makes sense." It was sarcastic tone.

"I got angrier because what you did to me became more cruel... and you got more warped because the man who cursed us wants to keep us from remembering... or at least you... because even if I remember and you don't we can't rest. Not until we both remember our love and live one lifetime fully and happily." Maybe that was why he was male this time? To keep Izaya from being able to truly hurt him.

"Then who's this man who wants to keep us apart? At least in this life, Shizu-chan?" Now, he didn't think it was Asami. He didn't seem warped or anything, and helped him out a lot.

"The one who cursed us... he always targets you. He leads you down paths you would not have walked down on your own and he's always older, he comes before we do when we're close to remembering and he makes sure to die again just after we do... so he can hover there and wait. He's gotten you to rape me forty times... and usually you killed me then too... I can feel him here... in Tokyo."

Izaya chuckled a bit, shaking his head. "There's no one I know who fits that description, Shizu-chan."

"His eyes are black... like tar pits and he always seems kindly enough but he always suggests things that are terrible...in this life he probably helped you become an informant, told you to get me drunk and made you love humans in the twisted way you do..."

Izaya frowned lightly. Shizuo had just described Asami. But he scoffed. Probably just guessing things. "Yeah. Whatever Shizu-chan."

Shizuo's eyes flickered to Izaya then. "I'm describing someone aren't I? Someone you know..." So he WAS here... "You should avoid him... he wants you dead just as much as me... more considering he thinks you stole me from him in our first life."

Again, Izaya just scoffed. "Shizu-chan shouldn't think about my work." Asami had never hinted that he wanted him dead. He was a friend, at least that's how he saw him as such.

"Hmn... fine... I give up after tonight anyways..." He got up now and headed for the bathroom. He had to pee again and he needed a shower seeing as Izaya had taken him earlier.

Izaya just shrugged. If the blond gave up, then he didn't have to deal with this all. It was why he had agreed to staying over. Sighing, he turned on the TV. Something good had to be on.

Shizuo cleaned himself off. He would give up but Izaya would be paying for this child until they were both dead. Shizuo would keep them far away from each other though... he wouldn't let Izaya ruin his baby if Izaya didn't remember. If Izaya didn't remember, Shizuo would have to find a way to make him pay for a kid that he wouldn't see or care for.

Izaya sighed as he stared at the TV. Nothing was on and he was bored. He needed his laptop. Or to borrow Shizuo's computer, if the blond had one. That way he could do some work.

Shizuo didn't though. They had always frustrated him and his brother had teased him about being useless as a senior citizen with them once. So he gave up using one ages ago. When he was finished showering he dressed in something comfortable, a t-shirt, some blue sweatpants. He started making something to eat now, ignoring Izaya for the most part.

"Shizu-chan, do you have a computer?" He didn't know that Shizuo didn't have one. So he asked. If not, he would head home to grab a laptop before coming back.

"I'm useless with technology," He replied though he learned how to cook really well thanks to one of his lives. "Want any of this?" He was making lamb.

Izaya frowned lightly before just sighing and nodding. "Yeah. Sure. But I have to head home to get a laptop first." Because he wasn't going to just lounge about all day.

"No. You're going to stay here like you agreed..." Shizuo worried that whoever it was in this life would try to stop this. Sure enough if Izaya tried to go home Asami would convince him to do more to Shizuo.

"I have to do work, Shizu-chan." But he sighed. Shizuo could very well keep him there. Or call Celty and her keep her there. So instead, he sent a text to the headless woman asking her to bring his laptop.

She said she would, and she did though as Shizuo feared there were ten emails from Asami. He knew Izaya was close to remembering now too and he didn't want that... meaning Shizuo had to die before Izaya remembered on his own.

Of course, Izaya read through the emails, taking note of them before starting to work. For the most part, he ignored the blond now.

A few of them were suggestions on how to hurt Shizuo... including one that said Izaya could always kill Shizuo while the blonde slept though admitting that might be a bit extreme. Less so than in their last life where he'd convinced Izaya to kidnap Shizuo and keep him -her at the time- chained in the basement.

It was a suggestion that Izaya put in the back of his mind, for future reference. Maybe, if this kept up, then he would just kill the blond while sleeping. Still, he did nothing about it for now and just collected information.

Shizuo put the food near Izaya when he finished. He seemed to have an affinity for fattier meats in each life so Shizuo assumed it would be true in this one too though he had no idea which fatty meat Izaya currently liked the best.

It was fatty tuna, ootoro, which was Izaya's favorite food. But Izaya didn't feel the need to tell Shizuo that. Instead, he just slowly ate as he worked. And though he didn't admit it, the food was good.

Shizuo ate too, silently before eventually turning on the news though it was mostly background noise. The evening passed by quietly and finally Shizuo sighed. "Going to bed now... you coming?"

Izaya sighed as he closed his laptop. "I suppose." It'd mean waking up sooner and then being able to just leave.

Shizuo flopped onto the side of the bed he always slept in and got under the sheets. He turned his back to Izaya, didn't want the other touching him at all right now... not until he remembered.

Izaya just rolled his eyes before getting into the bed and closing his eyes. His back was towards Shizuo as well, and he didn't even say goodnight.

Shizuo fell asleep eventually... lost in dreams of what had once been. He mostly dreamed of his first life now... it was the only one he really cared to remember...

Izaya drifted off soon enough, tired. However, while he usually didn't dream, now he did. And nothing restful either. He dreamed about what Shizuo had told him. Their first life. And a few of the lives after. Of course in each life the eyes were the same... and true enough Shizuo became gradually angrier... more aggressive and more violent with a shorter fuse and it wasn't hard to see why when one saw everything Izaya ever did to hurt him.

Izaya acquired a deep frown in his sleep, and while he normally didn't move while asleep, he thrashed about, like it was a nightmare. Thinking about it, it was, only real, and from the past. They were things he did to someone he loved... And worst of all he was still hurting that person. Even today he had... Shizuo was still as he slept... dreaming of more pleasant parts in their first life, he could focus on them and right now he dreamed of the time he and Izaya had first kiss... truly kissed, not the lustful ones Izaya gave Shizuo now or in all their lives between... but a kiss from love. Shizuo missed those terribly.

Around three in the morning, Izaya sat up with a gasp. He couldn't... He couldn't... Why had he done those things? Because of the curse, right? But that didn't excuse it. It didn't...

Shizuo had turned to face Izaya at some point in his own slumber, a soft sigh escaping him soon after Izaya had jerked awake. It was a sad one, one of longing too.

Izaya frowned lightly. He did hurt the blond. A lot more then he meant to. Quietly and carefully, he lay back down, but moved close to Shizuo. As close as he dared. He had to be there.

He wrapped one arm around Shizuo, and nuzzled his face against Shizuo's chest. A few tears escaped him. He hurt Shizuo so much...

It was the touch that woke Shizuo and he blinked a little as he did, groggy. "Izaya?" He mumbled sleepily, not sure if he was still asleep or if the other was trying to kill him... or if by some miracle he'd finally remembered.

He didn't say anything to Shizuo. He couldn't. He just couldn't. Instead, he just tightened his grip on Shizuo, more tears falling. He was so horrible.

"Are you...crying?" Shizuo asked gently, though it made him immeasurably happy... it meant Izaya remembered if he was.

Izaya just nodded slowly. Yeah. He was. And he knew why Shizuo had been so upset. "I-I'm so sorry... S-Shizu-chan." He hadn't remembered. He hadn't known. Or else he wouldn't have.

"You remember...don't you?" Shizuo wrapped his arms around Izaya gently now... now they just had to find a way to be happy together. Izaya's grip tightened around Shizuo. He didn't have to say anything. He did remember. Shizuo should know that.

He did and he kissed Izaya's head gently... lovingly.

"I still love you, you know..." He said softly, hoping that would help calm the other.

It did. Just a bit though. He was still crying though. Just from all the horrible things he had done. Shizuo rubbed his back gently, stroked his hair and kissed his head lovingly. He would until Izaya could calm himself enough; he knew the other felt bad about what he'd done... Izaya had been crueler and crueler in each life too though in this one he'd not gotten to his cruelest yet... but now maybe the cycle was broken... that gave Shizuo a good deal of hope.

After a bit, Izaya did stop crying, though he was still shivering a bit. "I am sorry, Shizu-chan..."

"I know..." He said gently, "I know..." He just hoped Izaya could be nicer now... at least to him. He prayed he could.

He would be. He'd try to be nice to Shizuo, at least. "Shizu-chan... Can we go back to sleep?" He felt exhausted.

Shizuo nodded, smiling. "Yeah..." He agreed, yawning, "Right after I go pee for the millionth time." He grunted next and got out of bed. The baby was right over his bladder right now after all. Izaya it seemed had gotten him pregnant the first time they were together much to Shizuo's chagrin.

Izaya smiled lightly and nodded. "Alright, Shizu-chan."

Shizuo shuffled to the bathroom and came back soon enough before climbing back in bed with his lover... because they were now... he hoped.

So did Izaya. He curled up close to Shizuo before closing his eyes. "Shizu-chan, tomorrow morning, we can learn more about each other in this life." Meaning talk. Because he knew about those other lives now.

Shizuo smiled at that, "Yeah... I'd like that..." He agreed.

"Good night, Shizu-chan." Izaya smiled lightly as he drifted off.

"Good night... Izaya..." Shizuo murmured before joining him there. He was so happy he could have cried too... because they finally had a chance together.


	6. Chapter 6

Come morning, Izaya woke first. But he didn't go to move or to wake Shizuo. He just decided to stay where he was and enjoy being with the other until he woke up. Shizuo had the softest of smiles on his face as he slept... he looked peaceful. For once he wasn't dreaming about his own lives... he was dreaming of something silly... but light... it was nice.

It caused Izaya to smiled lightly and run one hand through Shizuo's hair. But then, a thought struck him. Asami... What would Asami do...?

Shizuo would bring up his own fears too... because Asami was definitely the one who had done this to them. And he remembered them both, he had in every one of his own incarnation though he'd been alive fewer times than they had.

Izaya frowned lightly as he continued to run his hand through Shizuo's hair. Perhaps... perhaps he could pretend he was staying with Shizuo just for the sex, so that Asami would be none-the-wiser. But after the child...

It would be obvious sooner or later... Shizuo woke soon enough, smiling a bit more. "Morning..." He mumbled happily.

"Morning Shizu-chan. Did you sleep well?" After they had both woken up and gone back to sleep.

"Yeah..." He mumbled, snuggling into the other's chest a little.

Izaya chuckled and wrapped his arms around Shizuo. "So did I."

Shizuo stretched and groaned softly. He was hungry but he knew he'd throw up if he ate right now. "What do you wanna eat?" He asked.

"I don't know. Usually I'm already working."

Shizuo frowned at that, "We're eating breakfast," He said. He got up now and yawned widely.

Izaya just shrugged. "Alright."

"I think I can find something..." He got to work and made some eggs and rice and Miso along with bacon.

Izaya smiled lightly as he made his way to the kitchen table. "Smells good, Shizu-chan."

"Good... hope you like it..." He said, before putting a plate and bowl in front of Izaya. He poured himself a glass of milk though he took a pregnancy-safe anti-nauseate too with it.

Izaya nodded as he took a bite and hummed. It was good. Should have known though, considering the dinner he had the night before.

Shizuo ate quietly enough, "What's your favourite food now?" He asked suddenly.

"Huh?" He blinked, a bit surprised before getting at what Shizuo meant. "Ah. Its ootoro~"

"Oh... another fatty meat huh?" Shizuo grinned at that, happy. Some things remained similar with themselves.

The raven chuckled and nodded. "What's your favorite food, Shizu-chan?"

"Strawberries..." Another fruit. "Strawberry cake is good too... and strawberry milk..." He loved the sweet berry... it was always a berry or fruit with him.

Izaya chuckled lightly and nodded. "Mmm. Cute, Shizu-chan."

"What? They're delicious!" He pouted.

"I didn't say that was a bad thing, Shizu-chan." Still, he grinned. Now Shizuo was adorable. Surprising how his perspective changed once he regained the memories of his past lives.

Shizuo flushed a little and ate so that he wouldn't say anything. His manners though were impeccable, thanks to the training in most of his lives. He'd almost always been higher born than Izaya was.

Izaya chuckled and finished off his food before putting the dishes in the sink. "I'll was the dishes, Shizu-chan."

"Okay," He agreed. It was surprising how much had changed... Shizuo was happier now that Izaya knew who he was, now that Izaya remembered that they loved each other.

And Izaya was going to try to be nicer to Shizuo. This was one way. He smiled lightly before washing the dishes and setting them aside. "Done Shizu-chan~"

"Ah... good..." He smiled. "I... I dunno what to do..." he admitted. He didn't know what to ask either.

"Mmm. I don't know either, Shizu-chan. And I can't stay for too long. I have meetings with some clients."

"Yeah... what about... him?" Shizuo asked finally, he was afraid of what would happen.

Izaya frowned lightly before sighing. "I don't know, Shizu-chan. I guess for now, while around him, I have to pretend to still hate you."

Shizuo nodded. "Around everyone... you'll have to tell him I'm attacking you again or something..." He said finally. He didn't like the thought but they had no other choice. "Not that I can do much heavy lifting like this..." He rubbed his abdomen gently. What research he'd done suggested it was bad for the baby.

Izaya nodded. "Yeah." But if he kept tabs up... He mentally shook his head. No. Asami couldn't do something like that. He'd know if there were tabs on him.

They made idle conversation now, talking about things they liked, movies, books... and finally Shizuo had to say goodbye as Izaya had to leave. "Come back soon... okay?" Shizuo asked, frowning a little. He hated parting from Izaya now as much as Marciana had hated leaving Seth.

Izaya just nodded. "When I get free time, Shizu-chan." Before leaving though, he grabbed Shizuo's cell and put in a number. "I have several cell phones, Shizu-chan. I just gave you my personal number." With that, he left.

Shizuo smiled a little. He would text him if he needed anything.

Izaya frowned as he slipped into Shizuo's apartment. He had a key. "Shizu-chan." He looked around. Really, he had to sneak. Things were getting risky.

Shizuo glanced up and grinned, heading over. "Hey~!" He wrapped his arms around the other.

Izaya grinned, happy, and wrapped his arms around Shizuo. "I can't stay long, Shizu-chan. It's getting dangerous."

sighed softly. "I know... I wish you could though..." He moved to the couch, his hand in Izaya's and sat with the other quietly.

Izaya leaned his head against Shizuo's. "Until we can do something about him, it has to stay like this."

"I know..." He sighed softly.

Izaya kissed Shizuo's forehead. "I'm sure that we'll think of something, Shizu-chan. How about you come over tomorrow though? I don't have any clients then."

"Sure, we can think of something..." Shizuo agreed, then he grinned, "One thing though..." He pressed the other's hand against his abdomen. He had proof now that he'd been pregnant for four months.

Izaya grinned when he felt it. "Shizu-chan..." He didn't really know what to say.

It was definitely not muscle with how the area was starting to swell out. Shizuo grinned instead, "We'll get to see our baby this time," He said with certainty. He would not let anyone hurt it this time around.

Izaya laughed and wrapped his arms around Shizuo. "I'm glad. I'm really glad."

Shizuo grinned and laughed, nuzzling the other's neck. "Me too~"

Izaya let out a content sigh as he closed his eyes. "I wish I could stay here forever, Shizu-chan."

"I do too..." Shizuo sighed, holding the other close. "I love you... "

Izaya smiled a bit as well. "I love you too, Shizu-chan."

He stayed for about ten more minutes before standing. "I have to go now, Shizu-chan. As I said, tomorrow is free, and you can come over~ Noon if you want to eat lunch with me, otherwise around three is good. Alright?"

"Noon it is," Shizuo grinned, "I'll cook." He gave Izaya a kiss good bye.

Izaya smiled and waved before making his way home. Namie didn't question him about his absence, and he got on with work.


	7. Chapter 7

The next day, time seemed to pass slowly, and when he glanced at the clock, it was only 11:30. Izaya sighed. "So slowwwwww."

Shizuo was feeling it too... time always dragged when he was about to see Izaya and sped up when the other was with him... even during mock fights.

It was too bad for Izaya that someone planned to come by. He'd come up with another job he didn't really need and Asami was there at eleven thirty.

Izaya blinked in surprise. But he was also worried. "Ah, Asami-san, what brings you here?"

"A few things... a job and my own curiosity I'm afraid." He smiled pleasantly enough and sat down.

Izaya just nodded as he took a seat on the couch. This had to go quickly. "I see. I suppose the job shall come first, Asami-san. What is it you need me to do?"

He frowned now and decided to put in the ultimate test. "Shizuo Heiwajima. I want information on him."

Izaya frowned. "Ah, Asami-san, you do know that I never give out info on Shizu-chan. He's my toy." What he told all his clients, even before he regained his memories.

Asami frowned softly at that. "Is that so...?" He watched him carefully.

"Why yes, Asami-san. Don't you know this? Every time someone asks me for info on Shizu-chan, I don't give it to them. Because Shizu-chan is _my_ toy."

"More than a toy though isn't he? You two were sleeping together for a long while weren't you?"

"Oh?" Izaya raised an eyebrow. "Yes we were, Asami-san. You should see how torn up Shizu-chan is~" How he used to be. Keep this up.

So Shizuo remembered. "I see... that's all I needed." He smirked, standing. He was thinking Izaya might have remembered too but if they died soon then they would be forced back into the cycle of hate.

"Hm? Ah, are you leaving already, Asami-san?" Izaya stood now as well; ready to escort the other out.

"You remember," He said instead, a small frown on his lips. "It's not too late though, you won't in your next life."

Izaya blinked again before scowling. Damn it! And he had thought that he had acted well enough. "You're just jealous."

He smirked, "Jealous? Of you and the whore? Don't forget where you started out in the universe,"

"At least then, someone loved me~" Ah, shouldn't have baited him. But he couldn't help it. He was still a bit twisted.

Asami snarled and lunged at him. Yes. He had been jealous, what the hell had she seen in a stable boy? It was around now that Shizuo was arriving though.

Izaya yelped as the older male lunged at him, and just barely moved out of the way. He didn't have his knives with him either. He hadn't expected anyone to come by, except Shizuo, so he didn't grab them. He was defenceless.

Asami was after him though; if Izaya was killed Shizuo would follow him into the grave.

Again, Asami lunged at Izaya. And this time, Izaya didn't move out of the way in time. The older man grabbed him, and around the throat. He squeezed and hard, just in time for Shizuo to open the door. He knew who this was when he saw them and when he saw what Asami was doing... he snapped.

Izaya's eyes were wide and his hands were at Asami's hands. Though he wasn't prying them away on his own. His mouth opened and closed for air, but none would come.

Neither of them had noticed Shizuo who wacked up from behind and grabbed the man around his neck. He was going to crush this man's skull with his bare hands...

Immediately, Asami let go of Izaya, surprised, and his hands went to his throat. Izaya stumbled backwards, coughing as one hand massaged his throat.

No... Crushing a skull would be messy... so He wrapped his arms around Asami's rib cage and then used all the strength in his body. Asami's ribs snapped like toothpicks under the massive pressure Shizuo exerted and he was dead in a minute. Shizuo dropped him ones enough ribs were broken first and then went to Izaya as Asami gasped and struggled for air instead now.

"S-Shizu-chan." His throat still hurt, and there was a bruise there now.

"Are you okay? Do you need a doctor? A hospital?" He asked, frantic. He didn't even notice the man dying on the floor just a few feet away.

He shook his head. "I don't think so. It just hurts a bit." Izaya couldn't be happier that Shizuo had come.

Asami breathed his last right around there and Shizuo knew this was trouble... there would be an investigation. "I guess I shouldn't have killed him huh..."

Izaya let out a low chuckled while nodding. Then flinched. Probably shouldn't laugh yet. "No. I don't think you should have. But it was to save me. Self defense."

Shizuo touched his head to Izaya's. "We... should call the cops..." He mumbled.

"Yeah... I guess. Less trouble that way."

Shizuo nodded quietly and sat down... then he hurried to Izaya's sink and threw up, coughing a little when he did.

Izaya frowned and flipped open one of his cells before dialing up the police. They would have to get the body.

Shizuo couldn't help it though. He was nauseated and he'd just killed someone... and he still got morning sickness... he was scared again that Asami had won by dying.

"Shizu-chan... I have security cameras... They can see the footage and know what happened."

Shizuo shook his head, "They'll know I didn't have to kill him... Izaya I could have let him go and made him leave I c-could have b-but h-he was hurting you a-and-" He was crying now, definitely hysterical now. Hormones really were wonderful.

Izaya frowned and made his way over to Shizuo, before wrapping his arms around him. "Shizu-chan, they know about your temper. They can't blame you. And if they do... Then I'll bail you out." Or whatever he could do.

Shizuo hiccupped... "If I let him g-go he wouldn't stop would he?" He said weakly, burying his face into the other's shoulder.

Izaya shook his head. "No... He wouldn't have. He knew I remembered."

Shizuo swallowed hard and nodded, nuzzling the others neck.

"Shizu-chan. I already dialed up the police. They'll be here soon." He didn't want a dead body at his place. It was disturbing. And he knew the faster that it was gone, the faster it'd be for Shizuo to feel better.

Shizuo nodded. The police arrived, took their statements separately, accepted the video Izaya gave them of what happened and left. They wouldn't arrest Shizuo unless they could prove murder as self defence was not a crime.

Izaya bit his bottom lip once they left. "I hope they find you innocent, Shizu-chan."

Shizuo nodded, "C-can we go to my place?" He felt all wrong here at Izaya's.

He nodded. "Yeah... Let's..." He didn't like his place right now either. There was... dead body feel about it.

"Pack some clothes; you can stay over... forever if you want..." Shizuo suggested.

Izaya smiled a bit and shook his head. "It's nice, Shizu-chan, for you to offer, but your place isn't big enough for me and the baby to be once it's born. I'll stay over tonight, but then I'm coming back here." He put a hand on Shizuo's shoulder. "We can find a place to stay together though."

"It's big enough for you to stay until we find a place together..." He pointed out with a small pout.

"I know, Shizu-chan. But I don't want clients to meet up with me at your place." Because he didn't want them to target Shizuo and their child.

"Take time off... besides you have to figure something out sooner or later, I'm not living away from you forever."

Izaya sighed lightly. "Shizu-chan, it will take me a bit of time to get time off. I can't just say bye to the clients." He smiled though. "But I'll work on that tomorrow, so I can spend time with you."

Shizuo swallowed and nodded. He knew they had to work... he was even though he was four months pregnant... he felt like he was going crazy though and now he just wanted some time off to soft the universe out.

Izaya took Shizuo's hand. "Let's grab my nightclothes and a change for tomorrow, so I can stay tonight, alright?"

He nodded quietly but he doubted Izaya would need his night clothes. This was their first chance since after Izaya had remembered after all and Shizuo intended to take it.

Still, Izaya grabbed the clothes, and put them all in a bag. "Alright. Let's go, Shizu-chan."

Shizuo nodded and took Izaya's hand. He held it the whole way back to his place so by the time they got there more than a few rumours were flying.

Izaya didn't care about any rumors though. "Ah, Shizu-chan, what shall we do right now?"

"Just be together..." He mumbled, sitting on the couch... the same one they had lost their virginities on in this life.

Izaya nodded and leaned his head against Shizuo's shoulder. "Sounds good to me."

"You know... in as long as we've lived you're the only one I was ever with willingly..." He said suddenly. He'd only ever been with Seth when he was Marciana and Izaya when he was Shizuo as far as consensual sex went.

Izaya smiled. "I'm glad, Shizu-chan."

"What about... what about you...?" He asked, feeling awkward by asking.

Izaya chewed the inside of his cheek. "I think before, I may have slept with several others. But I can't quite recall why."

"You sure they aren't just incarnations of me?" He asked with a small snort... he was a little upset but then again... Izaya hadn't remembered him back then...

"It wasn't rape, Shizu-chan... And their eyes weren't yours." He felt horrible about it now.

Shizuo was certain Izaya felt horrible about a lot of things now. What mattered was they were together now and he didn't care about anything else. "Izaya... think it's a boy or a girl~?"

"I don't know. Either way, we would know how to take care of both, since Shizu-chan was a girl before."

Shizuo blushed a little, "A hundred times..." He mumbled with a small nod. He knew how to have the talk with her without dying of embarrassment like he knew Izaya probably would.

Izaya chuckled lightly, quietly too. "I don't care if it's a boy or girl. I'm just happy for our kid."

Shizuo smiled. "Me too... I can't wait..." He grinned, nuzzling the other's neck affectionately.

Izaya smiled. "We still have to wait, Shizu-chan. And are we going to have Shinra deliver?"

"Yeah, I think so... I trust Shinra not to botch it..." Shizuo agreed.

Izaya closed his eyes, relaxed. "And Celty can help him with it."

"Yeah..." He smiled. "Izaya... I... I love you..."

"And I love you, Shizu-chan." He did. He really did. Once he remembered, that was.

Then again every ounce of love they felt had translated into hate in their minds until they had remembered. "Let's... go to bed..." Shizuo suggested. It was way too early for him to be thinking of sleep.

Izaya grinned and nodded. "Oh, really Shizu-chan?"

Shizuo nodded quietly and then smirked lightly. "You know pregnancy hormones make me really... _needy_," he grinned.

Izaya laughed a bit, but grinned as he followed after Shizuo. "I guess it's good for me~" And Shizuo.

Shizuo snorted lightly, "You might change your mind," He pointed out.

"Change my mind, Shizu-chan? What do mean?" He was guessing the other effects of pregnancy. But he still wanted to make sure.

"Oh... well you know... you might not keep up eventually~" He grinned.

Izaya just chuckled. "We'll have to see, Shizu-chan~"

Shizuo smirked and climbed into the bed, waiting for Izaya. He wanted to have the other dominate him completely... but this time for love...

Izaya grinned as he climbed in after and hovered over the blond. "Does Shizu-chan just want me to do whatever?"

"Mmmn... No... I want you to own me..." He murmured. Izaya had claimed to in one life but what Shizuo wanted was different from that time.

"Own you, Shizu-chan?" Izaya grinned as he started to climb over the other now, and trail his hand along his sides. "Like how?"

Shizuo swallowed, "I think you know..." He mumbled.

Izaya lowered his lips down to Shizuo's neck and slowly kissed it. At the same time, his hands trailed to Shizuo's vest, unbuttoning it so he could pull it away.

Shizuo shivered lightly, enjoying the touch. It felt different somehow, more tender than it had before.

Because this time, Izaya did care for Shizuo. He wanted to pleasure the other, as well as get his own. The vest was pulled aside, before his fingers went to unbutton Shizuo's shirt. He also nipped at the blond's neck now, wanting to see how he reacted.

"Mnn~" Shizuo liked it when Izaya went for his neck... he liked nearly all the touches he could get though, they all pleased him in a way.

Izaya sucked on that same spot now, marking _his_ Shizuo. Seeing as the shirt was unbuttoned, Izaya's hands roamed his chest.

Shizuo's breath was beginning to get heavier, his eyes becoming clouded with lust as he enjoyed Izaya's touch. "Mnn~" he squirmed a little now, wondering what people would say to find out he was the one being dominated.

Izaya just grinned as he continued to suck that same spot of the blond's neck. His hands made their way to Shizuo's nipples, before running over them. Really, he loved how Shizuo reacted. It was wonderful.

Shizuo moaned softly, his spine arching a little as Izaya touched him.

Now, he removed his mouth from the blond's neck, and was satisfied to see a mark there. Showing that Shizuo belonged to someone. To him. "Shizu-chan likes this~" He purred out as he flicked the nipples, before trailing his hands lower.

Shizuo whined again. "Y-yeah I do~" He gasped lightly. He loved it.

Izaya grinned. Good. Shizuo was supposed to enjoy it. Now, his hands started to unbutton the blond's pants.

Shizuo rolled his hips lightly and whined again. He liked this more than every time before.

"Oh? Shizu-chan seems eager~" Izaya laughed lightly as he pulled down Shizuo's pants and boxers before running his hands down the insides of Shizuo's thighs.

Shizuo was eager, and his growing erection was proof to that. He shivered lightly and the small swell on his abdomen was blatantly obvious.

Izaya smiled before reaching for the bottle of lube he had left over. Grinning, he squirted a generous amount onto his fingers before inserting one and thrusting. This would be good.

Really good, for once Shizuo agreed and he moaned softly at the entry, his eyes half lidded.

Izaya's other hand went down to his own pants, so he could try and get them off. His finger continued to thrust as he did. And after a bit, the second finger went in.

Shizuo gasped softly, clearly approving of this.

Izaya grinned a bit more when he got his pants undone, and wiggled out of them as he scissored his fingers. Sure, he had taken Shizuo plenty of times before, but he wanted to be through for the blond.

Shizuo groaned a little. This was better... Izaya usually rushed the foreplay before now but this time...

This time he meant it. Before, it only mattered about him. Now, it was about them both, and more for Shizuo. Izaya smiled before letting the third and final finger join, and stretched them all apart.

Shizuo groaned and arched again, his eyes closing. He had never made so much noise before... sure he would moan before when Izaya got the right spot before but it wasn't like this, this was sweeter somehow.

It was a few more minutes before Izaya pulled his fingers out, and then applied some lube to himself, just to be sure. He hooked Shizuo's legs on his shoulders and lined up with him. "Ready, Shizu-chan?"

Shizuo nodded and swallowed a little. This wasn't their first time but in a way this was there first time.

Slowly, Izaya slipped inside, and then stayed still, waiting for the blond to give the okay.

Shizuo gasped lightly with a low whine and enjoyed the feeling for a moment. Just having Izaya inside him was nice, he liked being able to savour it before he rolled his hips gently.

Izaya nodded as started to move, slowly though. He also leaned close to connect their lips while thrusting, wanting to feel and taste the person he loved.

Shizuo wanted it too, he was more than happy to part his lips for Izaya too, his tongue moving into the other's mouth for his own taste.

Izaya slipped his eyes shut and let out a small moan as he thrusted. One hand stayed on Shizuo's hip, and the other trailed along his side.

Shizuo groaned, with Izaya, and past it. He loved every second of it this time.

His eyes closed now, as he picked up the pace. This was better than before. He could feel it.

Shizuo could too, and though his climax wasn't building the pleasure he got was intense, more intense than he'd felt before.

Izaya felt amazing. This... It had to last forever. That's what it felt like. Like it lasted forever.

It felt like that to Shizuo too but eventually his climax did start to build. By this point his legs had made it down to Izaya's hips and his arms were around the other's neck instead.

Izaya felt his own build. But he didn't want it stop. Not at all. Still, it had to. He thrusted as his hands wandered and he kept kissing the other.

Shizuo felt amazing when he came. He'd never come so hard or experienced such a rush from it and it was beautiful.

Izaya grunted as he thrust twice more before releasing, a light gasp leaving him as he did. It did feel amazing. Much better than when it was body only.

Shizuo grinned and held the other to him, smiling as he did. "I love you..." He breathed when he knew he could say it all in one go though he was still panting.

Izaya smiled lightly as he pulled out and lay down next to him. "I love you too, Shizu-chan."

"Mmmn... that was... amazing," He grinned as he nuzzled the other's neck.

"Yeah... It was." Izaya grinned as he closed his eyes. "Better than before." Better than when he didn't care.

"Much better~" Shizuo agreed, nuzzling Izaya's neck.

"Mmm. Sleepy now, Shizu-chan. But I wanna stay awake with you."

Shizuo smiled and sighed softly, "We'll have time tomorrow... and whenever we want now..." He pointed out.

"After I manage my schedule to take a vacation, Shizu-chan." Still, he smiled and yawned, ready to drift off.

"Mmn, but between there... we don't need to be scared now..." he pointed out. Shizuo would kill anyone who tried to stop this now.

The raven nodded. "Mm hmm. Night night, Shizu-chan."

"Good night," He smiled as he spoke and held the other when he fell asleep, again dreaming of happy things... normal things.


	8. Chapter 8

Izaya woke up the next morning in a good mood. He felt amazing. Probably because of Shizuo. No. Because of Shizuo. He smiled and stayed as he was, enjoying just being with the other. Shizuo breathed softly as he slept, but he woke soon enough and smiled softly when he realized that Izaya was still with him.

"Mmm. Shizu-chan. Morning. Sleep well?"

"Yeah... you?" He asked smiling softly.

"Mm hm. Of course." He grinned. He grinned before sitting up. "I had to have slept well, with Shizu-chan here." He smiled lightly and ran a hand through Shizuo's hair.

That made the blonde unbearably happy. He grinned and his gold eyes were brighter than they had been in a long time, like molten honey.

"Shizu-chan must have slept well because I was here." He grinned. "Because we are for each other."

"It was because you're here..." He agreed with a soft chuckle. Izaya was right, they were meant for one another... always supposed to be together like this.

"Mmm. Shall we go eat breakfast? Then I gotta get back to manage my clients."

Shizuo sighed softly and nodded, "Guess they won't be too impressed that you had the cops over either, huh?" He asked.

"No they will not. In fact, for awhile, I bet I'll have to go and meet with them, instead of them coming over for around a year or so."

Shizuo sighed and nodded, "Throws a wrench in things," He agreed. Rumour would likely be Izaya was raided or under suspicion or something.

The raven sighed. "Oh well." He stood and grinned before making his way to the kitchen. "Do you wanna cook, or should I?"

"You can if you want," Shizuo agreed. He got up too, pulling on some clothing to join the other in the kitchen.

Izaya laughed and nodded. "Alright. I will. What do you want, Shizu-chan?"

"Anything," Shizuo grinned, "No, something salty, Miso would be good but more than that too..."

"How about Miso and eggs then?" He was already reaching for the things.

"Alright..." Rice was a given since most people had it in every meal.

Izaya grinned as he started to cook. "Shizu-chan, could you go grab me my clothes? Or at least my boxers and jacket? It's kinda cold."

Shizuo rolled his eyes, "Shoulda thought of that before you wandered out to cook stark naked," He pointed out before heading into his room to grab Izaya his boxers and shirt.

"I didn't think about it. I was thinking about breakfast and you." Still, he grinned.

Shizuo handed him what he needed, taking over for a moment so Izaya could pull the clothing on.

Which he did rather quickly before resuming to cook. "Mmm. Shizu-chan is gonna like my food~" He chuckled lightly.

"Good, I just hope the baby does too," He chuckled.

Izaya grinned a bit more. "Yeah. Don't worry~ I'm sure he or she will."

Shizuo just hoped he kept it down. He was starting to get cravings instead of morning sickness though which was a nice change.

Izaya just smiled as he finished cooking and set out two things of food. One for each of them. "Let's eat, Shizu-chan~"

Shizuo ate happily and was glad when he held it down and to find his salt craving abated.

"And I do have to go now, Shizu-chan. To manage clients." Though he would really prefer not to go to his place. "After I get dressed, of course."

"You should borrow my shower too," Shizuo pointed out.

"Ah yes. I shall." He smiled and kissed Shizuo's forehead. "Thank you, Shizu-chan~" He grinned before skipping to the bathroom.

Shizuo smiled and waited for Izaya to finish. He planned to shower after but he also had to figure out how to talk to Tom too...

Izaya came out and dried himself off before dressing. "Alright, Shizu-chan. I'm leaving now. Okay?"

"Yeah, see you later," Shizuo gave Izaya a farewell-kiss to see him out the door with.

Izaya smiled and waved before walking home, making sure to take his time. His home had had a dead body in it... He didn't like it. Oh well.

Shizuo headed into shower and then he called Tom up, asking him if he was free to come over.

Of course, Tom could. He was over about a half hour later, and knocked on the door. Shizuo let him in though he wasn't sure how Tom would take this... or if he would believe it...

"Hey Shizuo. So what did you need me for?"

"It's... sort-of complicated... and I need you to keep an open mind if you can some of this may seem... unreal..."

He nodded. "Yeah. Alright. What is it?"

"I guess I should start with the most important part... I'm pregnant..."

Tom sorta just froze, obviously surprised. Shizuo was... pregnant? "H-how? And with whom?"

"Well... n-not sure how... but um... I'm not... this isn't my first life..."

"You mean reincarnation stuff?"

"Yeah... most people don't reincarnate so..." Shizuo sighed softly and shook his head; he had better explain it all. "I've reincarnated a hundred times... and I remember all my lives too... maybe it's because I'm usually a chick if you believe it..."

Tom frowned, but nodded. "Yeah... I guess I can see it..." It was strange, but he did trust Shizuo, and would believe his word.

"Anyways on to off who and this is going to be... harder to believe I think." He sighed and rubbed his abdomen gently. "Izaya's the father..."

"He... Is?" Now that was a bit harder to believe. "Don't you two hate each other?"

"No... It's... complicated. We have for about fifteen centuries but we were cursed to that outcome too... I guess... we weren't supposed to hate each other..." He finally managed.

Tom's eye furrowed, thinking about it. Finally, he nodded. "I don't really get it... but alright. As long as you're happy."

Shizuo grinned, almost shyly, "Yeah... I guess I am~" He chuckled. And he was happy... he could meet up with Izaya with relatively little fear and they knew they loved each other.

Tom patted the other's shoulder. "Alright. Take off as much time as you need. Your job will still be here when you do come back."

"Thanks... I would keep working but I'm... uhh... starting to show I guess..."

Shizuo's boss just nodded. "I understand. Go ahead. Take the time off, as I already said. I should get going though."

"Yeah... thanks Tom." He said, nodding. With that, Tom waved and left to go collect debts.

At the same time, Izaya had returned home. He tidied up, and then looked through his clients. "Ah... They're piling up. This is gonna take a while to reschedule." He started with the clients whose appointments weren't close up. Though there was a client who was supposed to show up about a half hour later.

Most of them though cancelled their appointments 'until further notice' as they said. They were nervous and who could blame them? They wanted nothing to do with an informant who had just been visited by police officers.

Izaya smiled lightly. Ah, that was a relief to know. Still, it meant he was making less money, not that it mattered with how much he had saved. He'd bring his laptop and a few of his phones when he went to stay with Shizuo. Namie would have to be given a vacation as well. Most likely paid.

Namie arrived right about then, clocking in as she always did though she didn't see the point in it and getting right to work.

"Oh. Namie. Perfect. You can go on vacation. Because I'll be going on one. Most of my clients have cancelled till further notice anyway."

"Eh? It had better be a paid vacation!" She snapped.

"Of course, Namie. You'll get a check in your mailbox every week."

"How the hell long is this vacation going to be?" She grumbled.

"Ah. I don't know. It could be a week. Then again, it could easily be longer than a year."

"A year?! You little... fine, as long as you pay me I don't care. Call me when you work again." She grumbled, stalking back out.

Izaya laughed but nodded before spinning around his chair. Yes. He would do that. Once it was alright to.

About two days later, Izaya had packed up most of his clothes, a few of his phones and his laptop. He glanced over to where Celty's head was. He'd have to give that back to. Not now though. Grinning, he started towards Shizuo's apartment now.

Shizuo was waiting for him, eating some fruit while he did, but he was also getting bigger every day. No surprise he was eating then.

Izaya grinned and set his bag of things down. "Shizu-chan~"

"Hey~" He grinned, over at Izaya from his spot on the couch. They'd have to look for a new place soon but for now this place would do.

Izaya chuckled now as he sat down next to Shizuo. "How are you?"

"Hungry," Shizuo joked as he ate though he leaned against Izaya.

Izaya chuckled again as he shook his head. "You're eating fruit already, Shizu-chan."

"So?" Shizuo shrugged as he finished that off. "I'm eating for two after all~ natural I'd be hungry right?"

Izaya chuckled again and nodded. "Yeah. I guess so."

Shizuo grinned and leaned into the other, snuggling up.

Izaya grinned and wrapped his arms around Shizuo. "I thought you were hungry, Shizu-chan. Not gonna get something else to eat?"

"Mmmn... maybe I'll eat you," He teased, though there was a sexual reference to it too.

"Oooh. I'm so scared~" He chuckled though.

Shizuo smirked and nipped the others jaw line playfully.

"Maybe you should be~" He joked.

The raven grinned now. "Ooh. But Shizu-chan can't eat me. Then I wouldn't be here."

"Mmnnn, maybe I should just enjoy a taste then~"

"Oh? As long as you don't eat me up."

Shizuo rolled his eyes and stood, tugging Izaya gently to make sure the other followed him into the bedroom... their bedroom now.

Izaya grinned a bit as he just followed. "So what is Shizu-chan planning?"

"I think you know~" He chuckled softly, pulling his shirt off when he got in. His weight gain had all been in the abdomen but he wasn't showing a huge deal... it was obvious he was pregnant with his shirt off though.

Izaya grinned. "Maybe I want you to tell me~"

Shizuo frowned, his cheeks starting to turn red in embarrassment. He wasn't good at just saying it...

"Come on Shizu-chan. Pleasssse~?"

"Couldn't I just show you?" He whined almost.

"Of course you can, Shizu-chan~" He purred out these words.

Good... Shizuo moved over and kissed Izaya gently though he hoped the informant would take over soon enough.

Izaya smiled as he kissed back, his arms wrapping around the blond as he did.

Shizuo tugged the other to the bed now.

Izaya grinned as he followed. "Mmm. Shizu-chan wants me~"

Shizuo nodded as he sat, moving back into the bed.

The raven grinned as he climbed onto Shizuo's lap.

Shizuo moved a little so his legs were around Izaya's hips and pulled the other down again for another kiss.

One that Izaya eagerly deepened, slipping his tongue into the other's mouth.

Shizuo groaned softly and rolled his hips already, grinning a little.

Izaya slipped his eyes shut and moaned lightly. Oh yes.

Shizuo tugged Izaya's shirt off though he was loathe to pull away from the other and his mouth made sure it found Izaya's again.

Izaya's eyes closed as he deepened the kiss. His arms wrapped around Shizuo's frame, as he made sure to keep them close.

Shizuo wanted more... His hands moved down to Izaya's zipper and opened it eagerly enough, making sure to grope the other.

Izaya let out a lewd moan. "Mmm. Shizu-chan."

Shizuo grinned impishly and used his legs to press their hips together now. Oh god he wanted Izaya inside of him... so badly.

Izaya let out another moan. "Oh. Shizu-chan is impatient, isn't he?"

"I blame hormones, and that's your fault," He grunted. It was and wasn't and Shizuo didn't really care.

The raven laughed. "I don't mind, Shizu-chan~" He didn't mind Shizuo being eager. "I can prepare you now, if you want."

He nodded and fought the heat that rose in his cheeks as a result. "Yeah..."

"Mmm. Then lay down, Shizu-chan."

He grinned and moved so he was laying down now.

He fiddled with the blond's pants, until he pulled them down. And then grabbed the lube. Izaya grinned and inserted two fingers at once, before scissoring them.

Shizuo groaned in sudden relief, grateful for the contact.

"Shizu-chan really enjoys this~" He grinned. He didn't mind.

"Mmmn... yeah~! You do too though~" Shizuo groaned, grinning happily.

"Yes I do!" He grinned as the third finger went in now.

Shizuo's spine arched when it did and he moaned sweetly. He loved the touch so much, every part of it...

Izaya continued this for a bit until he pulled his fingers away. "Are you ready for the main part?"

"Haah~, yeah~" He grinned, tugging Izaya's pants further down and off.

Izaya smirked and lined up with Shizuo before pushing inside of him. "Feels good, huh?"

Shizuo groaned and his toes curled up as Izaya entered him, it felt amazing to be like this... it made him feel complete.

"Tell me when to move." With that, he leaned forward and connected their lips.

Shizuo couldn't speak with their mouths connected so he moved his hips instead, rolling and bucking them lightly.

Izaya grinned into the kiss as he thrusted, his hands wondering Shizuo's body as he did.

Shizuo's hands moved into the others hair and his legs adjusted so he could move his hips with Izaya's.

Izaya moaned into the kiss and thrusted faster now. This. It was perfect.

Shizuo felt like it lasted for seconds... but it was nearly a half hour of this when his release began to build, even with Izaya hitting his sweet spot every so often.

Izaya was groaning with every thrust. It was just wonderful. The time. It did seem quick, but it wasn't.

Shizuo came soon enough, his spine arching as his body trembling in delight.

Izaya let out a loud moan as he thrusted again. It was amazing. And then, he released as well, eyes shutting tight as he did. Shizuo grinned as he enjoyed the sensation, shivering lightly and closing his eyes as he enjoyed the afterglow. Izaya stayed where he was a moment before pulling out and plopping next to Shizuo, a huge grin on his face.

Shizuo moved into the other, rolling slightly and resting his head near the other's with a gentle smile.

"Shizu-chan, I really do love you." He felt like he had to say it.

Shizuo's smile widened when Izaya said those words. "I love you too~" He murmured.

"Good." Izaya closed his eyes and smiled. "Because that's how it's supposed to be."

"Yeah..." Shizuo agreed.


End file.
